One of the most humbling things you can do for someone who is going through a difficult situation in life is to give your time, listen and walk beside them. It can also be challenging for you as the person giving support depending on the situation and whether you practice healthy boundaries or know what they are and how to use them.
I’ve been on both sides of the fence and know what it’s like to have support and be the person who gives support. I’ve had to learn the hard way on learning about healthy boundaries in the past. Although, being neurodivergent has definitely played a part. So to has being the person who used to be the “helper” or what is known as, “dysfunctional co-dependency” or the “peace keeper” in the family or group of friends which is why i am able to help client around these subjects now, from a place of experience.
Even though I am a coach and trained in many areas to help others in regards to setting healthy boundaries and more. I’m far from perfect and it’s a whole different ball game when you’re going through emotions yourself when helping someone else, as you’ll know if you’re going through this right now or have done in the past.
So what can you do to keep your own cup filled first so you can be there for the other person(s) as they go through a difficult situation?
1. Prioritize Self-Care
Acknowledge Your Emotions: It’s okay to feel overwhelmed, sad, or even helpless. Allow yourself space to process feelings that surface with compassion and without judgment as much as you can humanly possible.
Make time to Rest and Recharge when possible: activities that nourish you and bring you happiness – whether it’s journaling, meditating, walking in nature, or listening to music.
Perhaps immerse yourself in a creative project that you’re passionate about could be especially grounding if you have an interest based nervous system if you are ASD/ADHD, but not so much that you burn yourself out by over doing it. We know how easy it is to get hyper focused and loose track of time, so maybe introduce an amount of time set on a timer on your watch or device.
As much as it’s important to stay connected with people around you, it’s also important that you know yourself enough to know when to retreat and have some alonement time, which is why you’ll here many people and professional’s like myself refer to our home’s as, “a safe space”. Or somewhere where you can switch off and take time for yourself to rest and re-charge.
For example, my go to place if it’s not my house is a beach as it soothes my soul.
2. Set Healthy Boundaries
Supporting someone doesn’t mean you have to be available 24/7. By letting them know that you’re there for them can bring a sense of comfort and appreciation.
Remember to communicate your limits kindly, ensuring you protect your energy while being present when it matters most and limit the amount of time if you have a limited social battery.
It’s okay to say, “I may not have all the answers, but I’m here to listen” rather than taking on the weight of fixing everything.
3. Be Present for your loved one/family member/friend
Offer emotional support: A listening ear, small acts of kindness, or simply your presence can mean the world to them in the moment. Sometimes, just being there silently maybe all they need, just to be, have company and feel that they are connected and not alone.
Avoid giving advice if possible unless asked and try not to compare their situation to your because even though they maybe similar, each individual experiences challenges in a unique way – this allows space to process emotions and for them to feel heard which is important.
4. Lean on Your Support System
Just as you’re supporting the person(s), make sure you have someone you can turn to for your own emotional release—a trusted friend, coach, professional, group. Sharing the load lightens it and helps you to stay emotionally balanced when needed.
This can even be something as simple as having a cuppa and a chat.
Connection is one of THE most important things with your support network within challenging situations and supporting another and yourself. Human connection can also keep the immune system healthy and you happy.
The worst thing you can do is isolate yourself and bottle it up until you explode. So please do reach out.
5. Focus on the Now
Moments like these remind us to stay rooted in the present. Practicing gratitude daily can positively re-wire the brain to look for the positives within each day. Gratitude brings your focus back into the now moment. Gratitude also works with the law of attraction as in what you put out, so shall be returned.
Reminding yourself of what is within and outside of what you can control can also be helpful as a reminder of what you can do as a human being or not do in some cases to keep things real.
If you’re neurodivergent or experiencing a myriad of emotions, it maybe helpful to write down tasks you want to do in the day that are a priority and or pop in helpful reminders in your phone or diary to keep things normal.
Keeping a journal can also be helpful as your brain believes you’re taking an action by writing and releasing your thoughts on to paper or a digital device.
6. Incorporate Rituals or Practices
If you have an interest in the spiritual way of life or maybe it’s something you do within religious beliefs , creating a ritual like lighting a candle or setting an intention for healing can be a meaningful way to channel quantum energies from source to the quantum body. This is what I call, compassionate action and is actually really powerful, especially when a big group of people do it at the same time.
7. Ask your Universal Support Team of Guides to help (formerly known as – spirit guides)
We all have a Universal Support Team of Guides that surround us and are just waiting for you to ask them for help, assistance and or intervene on your behalf for you highest good.
You can also surrender over ANYTHING to them as a way of letting something go that is out of your control tat they can perhaps help with, whether it’s something big or small.
Your universal Support Team are made up of multidimensional celestial beings AND physical humans here who are part of your soul group.
I go into more detail around this subject in the Master Miracle Manifester®️ Quantum Manifestation course. But for now, knowing this is good enough to use and practice.
Remember… you can’t pour from an empty cup as it leads to burnout (especially within those who are neurodivergent), and your ability to support others grows when you’re taking good care of yourself.
As always, take what resonates with you. Maybe these suggestions have inspired your own ideas and been added to what you already know about having compassion for others and practicing self care?
Well done! You’re doing great!
Amanda Bowden Transitional Coach 2025©️