Please read slowly at your own pace and take what resonates with you and use your own discernment. I am a Transitional NLP Coach and not a medical professional. I have life experience from past events, clients, skills and CPD around trauma.
Complex trauma can be debilitating and is known as deep core healing in the spiritual community. Complex trauma is multiple events that have occurred in the past that are resurfacing in the now as the mind and body believes it’s time to heal from the trauma that may have been boxed up or as we say, i’ll deal with that another day.
The difference between C-PTSD and PTSD is that, PTSD is ONE single event that may have caused trauma.
We have been through some tough times and many people may not even realise that they are or have experienced trauma and going through a major transition at the speed we have over the last 3 years may have caused or stacked on top of traumas already there.
Below are some tips on how to best help yourself as you go experience trauma.
- STOP and ask yourself if you need to reach out and ask for some professional help and prevent it from going any further?
- Do you have a good support system around you and do you actually communicate when you feel this way because people care and you are NOT a burden, YOU are important? Having people who will listen to you and are able to speak to, reach out and communicate with, because you are important!
- Be KIND to yourself, CREATE your own JOY and HAPPINESS, take some time out for yourself by perhaps taking a bath, doing something that you love and makes you feel happy, comfortable, and safe. For some, this may be going to a gym, walking in nature, painting, music, whatever lights you up in the moment and brings in happiness and joy.
- Seek out therapies that may help such as, hypnotherapy, mindfulness, meditation, counselling, coaching, timeline therapy™, NLP, things that will relax your mind and body and release the negative emotions held in your mind and body.
- Journaling can be a huge help as you can release your thoughts out onto paper and this counts as an action to your mind. Keeping a gratitude diary will ground you in the moment and re-wire the neurons in your mind to focus more on the positive things throughout your day. The best time to write in a gratitude diary is just before bed (and when you wake up if you wish), and just write three simple things you have/are grateful for throughout the day, as simple as “Today I am grateful for having a cup of tea with a friend”.
- EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE (EQ) is a good skill to learn which is simply becoming self-aware around what emotions are surfacing or what’s being triggered by naming the emotion that is surfacing, feel it, ask yourself (out loud or in your mind), “What can I learn from xyz to be able to let go of any negative emotions easily and effortlessly?” because the unconscious mind will do as you ask it to do. And then let it go as your unconscious mind will do the rest of the work as you go about your day, remember to STOP, BREATHE and REMIND YOURSELF YOU are well loved, be gentle with yourself as you experience this.
- Learn to know what habits you do as you start to go into autopilot, what strategy you are running, for example I know when I am experiencing trauma as I start cleaning before I have my breakfast, forget about food and know it’s time to STOP, RE-EVALUATE and REMIND MYSELF that breakfast comes first.
- REMIND yourself that nothing is perfect and that it takes time to heal, and THAT is ok.
- Ask yourself if anything has gone out of balance in your routine and what would be helpful to get back on track. For e.g. you may want to lay out your weekly routine on a timetable so that you can plan and see what you are doing so it is outside of your head.
- Ask yourself what stressors you can take away, which may help take any worries away that are not needed, even if it’s small things like ordering a food shop online to collect. All the small things add up.
- ASK the Universe/Spirit Guides/Soul Team (whatever you resonate with) for help and assistance and surrender any worries and or concerns over to them to be transmuted into love and light and/or for them to intervene on your behalf to ease your situation.
- ALWAYS celebrate your wins no matter how big or small as it builds a sense of confidence, self-belief, and a feeling of being proud of yourself when you’ve achieved something a feeling of self-worth.
- BREATH WORK such as mindfulness, meditation or even just taking in some slow deep breaths can help as this will calm the mind and body as the parasympathetic nervous system reboots. Exercises such as box breathing, breathing in for 4, holding for 3 and then releasing can ease anxiety. This teaches and reminds your own mind and body to do what it does best and brings you back into heart-centre.
- ENGAGE the rational part of your mind by asking yourself WHAT, WHERE and HOW questions, because when you ask WHY it opens a can of worms and engages the reptilian part of the brain, and you’re looking to get the front of the brain (pre-frontal cortex) where the rational part is back in play and not the back of the brain where flight, flight and fawn kicks in (amygdala).
- ASK yourself what your diet is like? Does it need to be more balanced to include food that is healthier and cleaner for yourself, as the gut is a part of your body that communicates with your brain around what chemicals and/or hormones need to be released, so eating foods that are more natural and organic are much better than those filled with preservatives and chemicals.
- FRESH AIR is one of THE best remedies as it helps to circulate your blood around the body and grounds you whilst getting natural sunlight which, when it is shining, provides a HUGE intake of vitamin D that’s free and helps to boost the immune system.
- Choose a good supplement of vitamins that includes vitamin D, C, magnesium (magnesium is believed to help protect the body against stress) complex vitamin B, iron along with a good balanced diet. Don’t starve yourself of the nice things and become too strict on yourself, as suggested in the paragraph it’s about getting the right balance for yourself.
- Change small things in your daily routine when you feel like you’re in ground hog day, change simple things such as meals that you eat, walk along a new path, phone, or meet up with a friend and stay CONNECTED.
- Chewing a piece of gum can help to ground you in the here and now anchoring a physical sensation within your body.
- KNOW that you are not alone and that YOU are well loved, please REACH OUT and don’t suffer in silence!
*Taken from Spirology – Reflection Of Self The Road Back To Me that I self published in 2022 and is available on Amazon currently in print and kindle versions you can purchase via the link below.
Amanda Bowden Transitional Coach 2023 ©
amandabowden.co.uk